Blogtations

I always wonder

I always wonder why it is so easy to get out of bed at 5 am to go fishing, but it is so difficult to get up at 5 am to go to work.

~Wizard of Otin

My son has decided that sleep isn't necessary

My son has decided that sleep isn't necessary, which means my mind has concluded that forming complete sentences is also not mandatory.

~Interstitial Life

UPS never fails

UPS never fails to show up at nap time.

~Half As Good As You

The Earth simply could not rotate without me

Apparently, I am absolutely fundamental to the continuance of life as we know it. Completely irreplaceable. The Earth simply could not rotate without me. In fact, every time I drift off to sleep, the planet plaintively calls out, "Mum! MUM!" and I have to stagger in to push its axis up to speed again. "Remember to tilt at 33 1/3 degrees," I mumble as I stumble back to my bed and collapse asleep, secure in the knowledge that I've saved the world - again.

~Graze If You Want To But Don't Eat Dirt

I am so tired

I am so tired I could fall asleep even while being flogged with strands of fettucine alfredo. And freshly ground pepper.

~The Jannaverse

I have two hobbies

I have two hobbies: one involves being extremely rested and the other involves sleep.

~The Life of a Lovechild

Haven't slept more than 4 hours straight

Haven't slept more than 4 hours straight for the past week. May pass out any minute. Please inject caffeine or stronger substance directly into my veins.

~Manager Mom

Do not by any stretch of the imagination

Do not by any stretch of the imagination think that putting the leftover ham in a pot and turning on the burner and then going back to bed is a good idea.

~Tell Me About It

Is 10:00 a.m. too early

Is 10:00 a.m. too early for a nap?

~Wit's Bitch

Why do I have a butter knife in my hand?

Why do I have a butter knife in my hand? Hmm, it has mayo on it, I must have been making a sandwich. But wait, why am I standing in the bathroom? Wait, I don't even have any lunch meat. And, where are my pants?

I haven't slept much lately. Is it obvious?

~Barefoot Foodie

Sometimes the best thing to do

Sometimes the best thing to do is to go back to bed and start the day all over again...

~Dragonfly Dreaming

Why babies cry so much

New mothers often wonder why babies cry so much, and can't sleep for long stretches without requiring their parents' input. I don't wonder anymore. I know why. Babies require regular input because mothers must not be allowed to sleep for long periods of time. Certainly they must never be allowed to sleep and sleep until they have enough and are fully rested. And this is why: If a mother allowed her body to sleep until it woke up of its own accord, she would starve to death.

~Killing a Fly with a Ukulele is Probably the Wrong Thing to Do

"So how's the baby sleeping?"

"So how's the baby sleeping?"
What, the dark circles under my eyes aren't enough of an answer?

~Mothergoosemouse

Whoever said "Silence is golden"

Whoever said "Silence is golden"… never knew a 3 year old who was supposed to be taking a nap.

~Jenny on the Spot

I have to fall asleep to ESPN News. This is one of many reasons why my husband is the luckiest man in the world. How many wives have to have sports on to go to bed?

~Amy's Brat Pack

Imagine what a chainsaw trapped in a bucket of mucus sounds like. Yea. Got it? Now try sleeping next to that.

~The Housewife Diaries

My favorite pastime: sleep. My favorite color: sleep. My favorite smell: sleep.

~Imaginary Binky

When it's late at night, I pour myself a drink and watch re-runs of "Extreme Makeover" so I can cry myself to sleep.

~Metro Dad